The Muppets Made Me Do It

I was never a big rollercoaster person. If you want to get all philosophical about it, I guess it makes sense; I was always that person who needed to be in control, and rollercoasters were exactly the opposite. I can’t even say that I had a horrific childhood experience with a rollercoaster that scarred me for life … they just never interested me. Rather, they looked like something that would terrify me, so I just stayed away.

Until yesterday.

Yes, I went on a “real” rollercoaster that had scared me for years. It went upside down and everything, folks.

As always, there is a backstory.

I do like several “less intense” roller coasters. As a big Disney World person, I’ve always enjoyed Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, for example. I can tolerate Expedition Everest at Animal Kingdom. I even enjoy Tron, which is definitely a high-speed rollercoaster, although it doesn’t go upside down. The first time I went on it, the initial launch of 0-60 mph in 3 seconds just about put me over the edge, but once I got past that I was fine. I have only been on Space Mountain once, but that was because we got free Fast Passes (yes, this was a while ago) and I got a lot of peer pressure from my family. I hated that entire experience; I felt like I was going to fall out of the ride the entire time. That was about 15 years ago.

In the meantime, Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind opens at Epcot. And while it’s pretty fast and spinny, I absolutely love it. If it lasted 30 more seconds, I would probably toss my cookies, but it’s just the right length to keep my upchuck reflexes in check. I have ridden it so much that I have now “collected” all six of the random songs that play during it. (It’s good to have goals, people.)

For someone who doesn’t do rollercoasters, I’d say I was doing pretty good. Granted, I would never go on any of those monster rides at a Six Flags (the horror!) but I was quite pleased with the progress I was making in my rollercoaster journey.

However, there is one other Disney World coaster that has eluded me for years: Rock ‘n’ Rollercoaster at Disney’s Hollywood Studios. I knew it went upside down, and as my stepson Chase once told me, “You would hate it.” I avoided it.

But then something happened that made me change my mind.

The Muppets happened.

Disney announced that the ride was being re-imagined from it’s Aerosmith concept to a Muppets theme.

GAME. CHANGER.

This girl LOVES the Muppets. I grew up watching The Muppet Show, and I’ve seen all the Muppet movies. Nothing makes me happier than getting a reel featuring Beaker or the Swedish Chef. My Disney Plus avatar is Janice from the Electric Mayhem Band.

It took the Muppets to finally convince me to get on that roller coaster, loops and all. I could survive the initial launch on Tron, so I could do this. My love for the Muppets was too much; I was going to take the plunge.

The day at Hollywood Studios started with Hollywood Tower of Terror. If you are familiar, this is a ride that randomly drops you several stories in an old service elevator. Somehow, inexplicably, I am entirely okay with this.

After that warm-up ride, I figured it was now or never. We headed next door to Rock ‘n’ Rollercoaster, featuring my beloved Muppets!

During the first part of our wait, I wasn’t too nervous because I was honestly too busy wiping sweat from my face. If you ever want to know what it’s like on the surface of the sun, just visit Hollywood Studios in the summer. The hottest concrete, ever. Luckily this was short-lived and we made it to shade and then inside. I was treated to some sweet Muppets memorabilia and then a very cute and funny pre-show featuring all of my favorite Muppets. Then it was into the loading area.

My heart started to race. My Garmin watch spoke to me: “Stressed? Let’s Breathe” it said. Really.

Thankfully my sweet friend Tanya was with me to calm me down and be my wing-woman. I wondered what song we would get - I wanted it to be Song 2 by Blur. Or Love Rollercoaster.

There was an actual countdown: 5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1. And then we were catapulted out at 57 mph in 3 seconds. I survived. The loop came shortly after, but honestly it was so fast that it didn’t even bother me. After that it was all fun, fun, fun and smooth sailing. I sat back with a smile on my face while listening to “Walkin’ on Sunshine”. And before I knew it, it was over. And I wanted to go back for more. I didn’t hurl, and I didn’t feel like hurling.

Thank you, Muppets … for getting me out of my comfort zone.

In the immortal words of Blur … woo HOO!!!