Whoever is in charge of my social media shopping feed knows me. It’s kind of eerie, to be honest. Not only does the algorithm know the brands and stores I like - and am most likely to like, once they tell me all about them - but they can pick out my style as well as the exact outfits that tempt me the most. You won, smarty pants programmers! You successfully tripped all those happy buttons in my brain that make me like shiny (usually expensive) things, and I fell for it all. I saw your goods and I bought them. A lot. And clearly the internet knows my demographic, based on the perimenopause supplements, weighted vests, workout programs, and cortisol belly ads that are thrown my way on any given day.
But lately it seems that the algorithm has been a bit … off. Allow me to explain. Here are some examples of things that it normally suggests, so you can get a little sense of my taste and style:
Example 1: Amazon presented me with these super fluffy slippers. In fairness, my current slippers were looking pretty ratty (and I’m embarrassed to say how old they were) so I did buy these little beauties. They even garnered a “super cute” response from my husband. No regrets.
Example 2: Mark and Graham showed me these golf club covers that are both preppy and Caddyshack themed. JACKPOT. They basically brought together everything I like into one product. Well done. I have not bought them yet, but let’s just say I am tempted.
Example 3: Lastly, there’s this shirt … it’s classic, it’s well-made, it comes in many colors, and Oprah likes it. (Not usually a huge Oprah fan, however she does know her shit.) Naturally the price is so high that Macklemore might make another song about it.
Now, let’s see the confusing things in my feed:
Example 1: Dick’s Sporting Goods shows me a HARNESS. What? I have never shown any interest in horses in my life, much less clicked on posts about horses? I am so confused. What in the Black Beauty is going on? (That’s a famous horse name, right?)
Example 2: While Amazon showed me the cute slippers above, they also showed me these black thigh high fur boots. I am genuinely concerned about how many Muppets were sacrificed to make these.
Example 3: Chewy. Let’s start with the fact that I don’t own any pets, so Chewy should not even be in my feed. But secondly … a pitbull muzzle is the first thing presented to me? A Chewy Vuitton toy makes sense. This seems aggressive. I mean, at least buy me dinner first, Chewy.
And lastly … I won’t even get into the Marc Jacobs peplum collection that was presented to me, because frankly that was just insulting. The last time I checked, nobody was shopping for super lumpy sweaters with built-in beer bellies. I honestly had to check if this was real, and unfortunately it was. The translation from runway to store was a huge fail, IMO.
In conclusion … it’s been interesting and a bit confusing lately. What’s the strangest thing you’ve seen in your feed? Let me know your comments below.